My official… and final statement regarding Mr. ArmstrongJanuary 18, 2013
This will be the last time I write about Mr. Armstrong. My sentiments remain the same about this entire situation: click here for that.
My final comments are these;
It’s not the doping that I find horrifying. It’s the lying, the deceit, and the ease at which it came. I believe it takes an entirely new level of narcissism to be able to do that and live that.
How do I feel? I feel like I believed in Santa Claus….. I had an idea that it wasn’t real…. and feel heartbroken to learn that it was not real. I feel sick to my stomach to realize that someone is that good of a liar. That shakes me to my core. I feel like I believed in someone and something (the all American story), I defended Mr. Armstrong….. and to put it simply…. I was wrong.
for a while now I have struggled about what to do with these feelings of gratitude I have towards Mr. Armstrong for helping us achieve what we achieved. He did give us a platform on which to stand. I have been struggling with how I categorize that and where I go from here.
I will continue to be grateful. It’s okay to always be grateful.
What I can do from here…. is do it better than he ever could. I can continue to live honestly. I can continue to live to a higher standard and I can be everything he could not be. His actions don’t dictate my future. His actions don’t tarnish the work we have been able to do and his actions certainly don’t bring us down with him.
So from here…. I say thank you Mr. Armstrong….. and walk away. Proud of what we have done, grateful for the platform that we were given….. and praying for him at the same time. He has put himself into a hole that took decades to dig….. and I don’t know if he will ever climb out of. That’s for him to figure out.
I don’t need Mr. Armstrong to continue the work that we do. I continue to do that work and I do it better.
Will I change the top banner in the blog? Likely. Those kinds of things take time…. I am in no rush.
If he came to my door would I let him in? Certainly. I’d slap him across the face and keep my dog in the room. I don’t have trust anymore.
Will I watch the rest of the interview? I don’t think so. I have heard enough.
Here is my advice to you……. move on. Don’t spend your day talking about him. Don’t waste words on social media about it. That’s space that can be used to positively, instead find something inspiring to share with the world. Be better than Mr. Armstrong ever could be. The easy thing to do is sling shot hatred around. Hate is easy. Hate is a terrible trap. Instead….. go out and be a better person. Put this behind you and walk away. It was a fun ride while it lasted for those who were not in his line of fire. It was a fun fairly tale to believe in for some of us. It’s over. It wasn’t true. The wool was pulled over my eyes.
As we walk away…. let’s look the future. I have been promised that there are some up and coming professional cyclists over there. Honest ones. Ones that can have the same sort of platform and ones that can be our real American hero. The next American who wins the Tour…. clean… is going to need to be ready for one hell of a parade.
As I walk toward that horizon I have gratitude in my heart for all that has happened since March. It’s too heavy a bag to drag around satisfaction and hatred and unkindness. Don’t ask me what I think of all of this…. it’s right here. I am moving on. Don’t bother sending me thoughts to engage me…. they get thrown out before they hit my eyes. I don’t have time for it anyway.
This is my final answer.
It’s time to move on. To build on this platform. To live better and to be better.
We have work to do. And another challenge on the horizon.